The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost

In life, there are so many choices to make each day; to eat the salad or the noodles? to wear the yellow shirt or the red one? to choose a barbie or a teddy for a birthday present? As we grow older, the choices seem to be harder to make.

Recently I felt so lost in life, not knowing what to do next. The vision of myself in the future suddenly became so blur that I could hardly see it anymore. It feels like driving in the dessert without knowing the direction, not knowing what lies ahead. I was scared for once. I used to have clear vision on my own future. I planned them carefully, knowing exactly what I really wanted and work hard towards them.

My health started to have problems when I was 15 and I had went through so much to get through it. For that couple of years, my house fridge had turned into a medicine storage. Taking medicine daily became part of my routine need not mention carrying them around whenever I go. That was the first time I thought about my future, seriously. I told myself that I wanted to work with medicine so that I can help people including myself. I set the goal when I was 17. I work hard towards my goal and I was happy with the results. When I turned 19 and started another chapter of my study life, things changed and went out of hand. I had to change my plan but I wasn't panic at all. Again, everything was on track and I went to University. I worked hard and played hard during those times; I was so close to my goal yet to find out that was not something that I really wanted.

"I'm lost." I thought to myself.

All of a sudden I can no longer see my future. I no longer know what I want to do. Thanks to my bf's mother who found me a temporary job where I can work while rediscover what I really wanted. Two months have passed and to be honest, I have not find anything just yet. So I plan not to pressure myself too much and decided to take up masters degree to basically give myself some time to figure out what I want; and also to create more options for myself in the future. I hope this is a wise decision.

Wish me luck for my future:)